Zoe wrote:
Just Mom, not sure what you meant by this:
Quote:
But sometimes and it may be in this situation, that you might be " being spared" something that down the line becomes worse than what you see it to be as of right now.
trying to figure it out but thinking it means that if I was included with John's family get together's that it might be worse because of gossip and hurtful words said.
I could use all the positive criticism or suggestions you can throw my way.
Good morning ZOE,
I am not fully aware of the family situation. You had mentioned you thought his children view you as a home wrecker. You may never be able to change their viewpoint of this even if they think the marriage prior was not so great.
And you did mention that John is still married. So it is a awkward situation to begin with and that may be only part of it. I don't know the rest of this.
I realize it hurts you that they do not accept you. But honestly, their unacceptance of YOU may be stemming from John as well as he wants you no part of HIS family.
Either he has a problem as well, or he might just be looking out for your best interests and not wanting to cause you even more pain.
I am not sure how unhappy you are with this whole family,relationship, partner arrangement. I'm not trying to be insensitive ZOE, truly, I am sorry!
But despite what you have shared with us in the past about John and what he just recently did as to your money savings, if he lacks respect for you for whatever reasons, his children are going to feel the same way.
But as always, we must first look at ourselves and see what we ourselves bring to the table. In anyway have we contributed to anything that has caused this reaction?
If we honestly feel our conscience is clean and we are truly still not happy....
Then it is up to us to either " make the change" or learn now to accept the situation that it has become.
Because whatever it is, it is still a choice we make and made one way or another.
At least you have your children and grandchildren even if you don't get to see them very often.
And I don't know the situation around this as well. Do they live too far away to visit more often?
Love and peace to you ZOE,
Justmom