xjwsforChrist

Do people "try" you (peace to you, all!)? Why do they STILL assume that because you profess to be a christian... that you WILL be "nice"... when you have OPENLY CONFESSED... before God and everybody... publicly, even... that you are NOT nice?? Do they think your "conscience" is going to "condemn" you so that you don't stand your ground when they are being... whatever it is they're being?

See, in MY book, such a person would be "perfect." Able to control EVERY emotion, feeling, thought, and action... at all times. I personally don't know anyone like that. Or even OF anyone like that, as my dear Lord was not always able control HIS emotions. And we are SO far from what he was and is. Well, I mean, I know I am.

Which is WHY I need a savior. Because left to myself... man, the things I would say (and perhaps do) to some people.

No, I don't pretend to be nice... because it would be a lie. I TRY to be kind... and loving... and as peaceful as I CAN be under the circumstances that have presented themselves... but I KNOW I will fail more often than succeed.

Praise JAH, then... for ME... that there IS a savior: the HOLY ONE of Israel, JAHESHUA, the Chosen One of JAH (MischaJah). Were it not for him, I personally would have no hope... other than the pit. BECAUSE of him, though, I DO have hope... such that I can continue doing what HE wishes me to, in spite of... well, a lot of things.

I am posting this, though, to say, once again, to anyone who will bother to listen: I am not nice. I sometimes despise the word. I don't strive to BE nice. So, don't expect it from me. Because you will most probably be disappointed if you do.

Peace!

A very unworthy slave of Christ, who DOES understand God's mercy and grace, because she is a foremost recipient of it... as it SURELY is NOT deserved... by ANY stretch... in her case,

Shellama... who's a bit "sickofit"... just sayin'...

Why...this type of a thread?

Why?

What is the motive?

What is it to accomplish?

What are you wanting to gain from it?

Who are you talking to?

Whom are you talking ABOUT?

What are you sick of?

~s-K-ally

_________________
"I am proud to say that I will not lift one finger ( except my middle finger) for the WTBTS."

Besides the fact that it's my prerogative to post what I wish, so long as it's not malicious or indecent, dear Skalls (peace!)? What other reason do I need?



I felt like it so why not?



Love, dear one. Helping some who may not get it... get it. Hopefully. I understand, they may not LIKE it, but I can't do anything about that.



Well, notice, primarily... along with getting it off my chest (I tend to get a little "sick" when I don't get things off my chest).



Well, along with alleviating some (obvious) confusion on the part of some... not having it on my chest any longer.



Whoever cares to hear, dear one. No one else.



Myself. Was that not clear?



You mean besides people not getting that I am telling the TRUTH when I say I'm not nice... and so somehow seeming to expect to be anyway? Not much else, really.



Shellama (peace!)

I think it's a kind of a "Ya, boo, sucks to you!" kind of thread, isn't it?

Like, "I'm all right so I don't care what you think?"

And just to make sure we all know you're not nice, you announce it.

Don't worry, some of us got the message some time back that you are not nice and you are certainly not going to play nicely. Ever.

Got it.

Unless it was a call for sympathy from your fans here, readying yourself for an onslaught of "No, Shelby, we love you, you are nice!" etc.

To change tack, as an aside which may be of interest to some if not all....there is another, very different meaning to the word nice.

It can mean precise, exact, taking the trouble to be meticulously careful to attend to detail. Thus, we have a nice argument, one that perhaps rests its logic on recognising exact meanings. Or "nice attention to detail".

I am in the process of teaching my 3 year old the difference between being "nice" and being "mean." I tell him that all the adults in his life are nice people and therefore he should follow their example and strive to be nice too. This works all well and good for the most part, but I have noticed that he will, at times, license himself for negative conduct by claiming that he is a "mean boy" rather than a "nice boy." If he believes he is mean, then it's OK in his mind that he is doing mean things despite the positive example around him.

Shelby is giving herself the same license to do bad that my 3 year old gives himself. I am surprised that the OP was written by a full grown adult. It's a moral cop out and doesn't hold to the frutiages of the spirit in the least bit. Nice doesn't equal perfect, that's a straw man fallacy.

-Sab

Let those here who think they are perfectly "nice" cast the first stones?

Loz x

_________________
"This is my son. LISTEN to Him!"

It can mean precise, exact, taking the trouble to be meticulously careful to attend to detail. Thus, we have a nice argument, one that perhaps rests its logic on recognising exact meanings. Or "nice attention to detail".

Good morning Char...

I have known Shelby the longest of anyone here and I am truly aware of her qualities she possesses and I know being nice ( on most occasions) is not her gift. Although I see her niceness more often than others because of the love she shows towards individuals at times.

But based on this view or definition of what you feel " nice to be" ...then Shelby may be a much nicer person than we have given her credit for! I have seen this definition repeatedly on this forum as to how she expresses herself.

Just a thought of mine
Thanks all
Justmom

I'm a nice person but that was always NOT the case.
I had a chip on shoulder at times.
Not that I was bad it was just that the moment ANYONE crossed me, they CROSSED me and forgiveness was not really in my vocabulary.
People learned NOT to try my patience because, well, I had no issue whatsoever in making it physical, very physical at times.
I didn't bother arguing verbally with people, my view is if you pissed me off enough to make me wanna paste you, then you deserved it.
My years in the MA didn't help that and, many times, made it worse ( it is a common misconception that MA training makes you peaceful, it does to those that have never been exposed to violence, but those that have, it makes them "cold" AND violent, a dangerous combo).
My wife helped me and being a father opened my eyes to what unconditional love is, what it really means and because of that, I was able to be open to Our Lord, to His love and voice AND to understand the things that made a wall between Us.
When that wall fell, the person I was slowly, but surely, changed.
I couldn't have done it without Him and my family.

I believe, truly, in this: Be the change you want to see happen.

First, to the "peacemakers"... peace to YOU... and thank you, truly, for trying. Not sure it's gonna make a difference, though. The ONLY thing that will make a difference is for me to be "nice" to a couple/few folks here... "nice" being for me to say/agree with what THEY wish (from me)... and, unfortunately, given what they want me to say/agree WITH... it isn't likely to happen. But I understand YOUR wish/need/desire for peace... and, again, thank YOU for trying to mediate/foment that. Truly.

Now, then...



Did you also tell him that you were lying to him? I wonder how "nice" he will think YOU are when he realizes you did (you know, when one of those adults turns out to be not so nice). And if you've already started lying to him, well... doesn't look like he has much TRUTH to look forward to from you. A word of advice from someone who's raised two who are now in their 30's... and neither of which have ever given me a DAY of trouble? Children don't like to be lied to. Even technically. And once they realize you've told them ONE lie... everything ELSE you tell them becomes suspect. EVERYTHING else. Which is why a lot of them rebel: because they come to the realization that even their own PARENT(S) can't be trusted to tell them the truth. Forget about religious leaders - YOU owe them that.



That's probably because of the definition of "nice" and "mean" YOU gave him ("If you do THIS, then PEOPLE WILL THINK you are "nice". If you do THAT, then PEOPLE will think you are "mean.")



No. If he believes in his mind that is it OKAY to BE mean... THEN it's okay in his mind that he is doing mean things... despite the positive example around him (that last which is questionable, IMHO). If he believes HE is mean... he's gonna have some serious problems when he grows up. I do like the way, though, that a first-time father of a 3-year-old... who doesn't even know what HE thinks at times... thinks he's got it all worked out - LOLOLOLOLOL! And by "all", I don't just mean teaching a 3-year-old the difference between "being nice" and "mean."



What bad? I haven't done any bad. I simply reiterated that I am not "nice." I have also stated what "nice" means, on several occasions, with regard TO my reiteration. That I am not "nice" does not mean I am mean or bad. I am simply NOT "nice." For the most part, I am actually pretty indifferent.



Oh, please: given what YOU write at times? Ain't gonna work: my self-esteem in very intact and isn't dependent upon whether others view me as "nice"... or a full grown adult. I have successfully raised two wonderful people, that MANY can and will attest to. If nothing else, THAT makes me "full grown." The world has yet to see what YOU will have raised. Ask me, folks should prolly start shaking in their boots NOW.



"Nice," isn't a fruit of the spirit. I think you confuse that with "kind" (as many do). No surprise. You confuse a lot of things.



In my experience "nice" tends to equal folks who think THEY are perfect... and so expect perfection from everyone ELSE... while hypocritically not being able to attain to it themselves. You know, rather than admitting that, when it all boils down, they're not REALLY "nice." Not by a long-shot. They're just blind as to themselves, and think others are, too. And may ARE. But not all. Some see you folks... plainly... and as you TRULY are.

My advice to such folks (but not you; you're way past this point)? Ask for ears... so as to hear and get the sense of this:

"I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth. You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see."

Also, to learn how to conduct yourself when you're a guest in another's house. Something you should ALSO be teaching your young son. How can you teach HIM, though, when YOU don't know how to do it?

A slave of Christ,

Shellama, tossing THAT stone right on back...

I am in the process of teaching my 3 year old the difference between being "nice" and being "mean." I tell him that all the adults in his life are nice people and therefore he should follow their example and strive to be nice too.

Good morning Sab...

In all honesty Sab I truly wish you the best with the direction and raising of your 3 years old. Wouldn't trade places with you for anything as 3 year olds because teenagers ( would love to have a chat with you then) and then they become young adults ( another chat and I promise you'll be seeng things with a little different perspective)

But I understand what you are doing in teaching him to think that the adults in HIS life are nice people.
Although intentions are good,

he will grow up only to find out that MOST people are either NOT NICE or if they are nice, they are NOT TRUTHFUL. Most nice people that are nice most of the time have a lot to hide!

We learned that perfectly in the WTBS. And as well in the world now if we really observe people.
It's not a judgment just a fact!

So, you know this about Shelby. She knows this about herself. She doesn't hide it. But she does not lie to you either. I hope in time you will be able to see this. Time and parenthood truly lets you look at things differently.

Enjoy parenthood, it is a wonderful rewarding job. The hardest job you'll ever LOVE!
Justmom


P.S. Sab, please don't tell me you tell your son there is a Santa Claus ?!??

my self-esteem in very intact and isn't dependent upon whether others view me as "nice"... or a full grown adult. I have successfully raised two wonderful people, that MANY can and will attest to. If nothing else, THAT makes me "full grown." The world has yet to see what YOU will have raised. Ask me, folks should prolly start shaking in their boots NOW.


I can honestly and truthfully attest to this fact as to Shelby's children.

Her children are truly generous, self sacrificing, loving, hard working, respectful individuals.
Her son mentors so many less fortunate children and gives them hope and an opportunity and self confidence to go somewhere in their lives. They view him as a dad at only 31.

Her daughter is talented, helps individuals have an opportunity that others might not have given them..and has given her last dime and clothes off her back to those that ask.
Even those that would take advantage of her.

She should be proud as a single parent. Although I am quote proud of my 3 sons now, I will admit I could not have done it as a single parent. Way too hard.

Just wanted to share this
And we all wish this for our children and that they grow up and be happy as well.

Love to you all
Justmom

Poor you, Shelby!

How awful it must be to think that being nice has anything to do with being to people as you think they want you to be.

What a very limited view of the world and an even more limited understanding of other people!

Oddly enough... not being 'nice' is not a sin.


Speaking or acting from something other than love... or truth.... that is a sin.


But not being 'nice' ... is not a sin.

In fact, being nice is often at odds with being truthful. Because nice does not want to offend; nice wants to be "pc"; nice wants to tickle ears.

From the OP:




This thread was not an invitation for personal attack.



One might think that we could find something better to do... to contribute TO this forum (that is of course unless you disagree with the purpose of this forum altogether, though why you would be here if that is the case, I do not know)... other than simply finding an excuse to cast a stone.


Peace,
tammy

Hate is the absence of love which perfectly describes your response, Shelby. Children are not born with the absence of love, but quite the opposite. They are born with NOTHING BUT love for whatever they touch. That love starts off in the womb where they develop emotional attachment to not only their environment, but the things within it such as the placenta. Humans are born nice and only through a systematic reconditioning can this be altered (something the destructive heresy of Original Sin accomplished).

Because I know this I remain intellectually honest when I inform my child that he lives with nice people. We set the example and we do a very good job as a matter of fact. However, we also teach our son that nice people sometimes act mean. We also teach him that being mean is a perfect opportunity to prove whether or not you are nice. Nice people act differently than mean people during and after being mean. For example nice people apologize which is what we teach our son to do and lead by example. This helps him understand that being a nice person doesn't require perfection which would be an unreasonable demand. Niceness is a Godly standard which has been laid down in Scripture for us all to follow. We only need look within to find the compassion that was designed into us through the process of evolution.



No, he will grow up confirming the understanding of people taught by his parents whom have more than adequate experience with them. You see, you don't have the travel to far away lands to understand the nature of people, they are all alike in fundamental ways. Those fundamentals are spelled out in Scripture rather eloquently in fact and are in the process of rigorous scientific study. Genesis 1 states that God's creation is good or pleasing to His senses. That means that humans were created MORAL, GOOD and....... NICE! What's beautiful to God are the fruitages of the Spirit.

That's why my child has been able to grasp the concept of niceness at such a young age. Because it's already in him, it just needs to be brought out and maintained. This is done by example and through education.

-Sab

Do you believe that calling down eternal sin on another is an invitation for personal attack? If not, then what is? It's definitely not very nice.

-Sab