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 Post subject: Ferguson... My Take...
PostPosted: Mon Nov 24, 2014 11:04 pm 
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Peace to you, all... and please know this is just my personal opinion, as I shared with another one. I may have this opinion based on what I've learned from my dear Lord, the HOLY One of Israel and Holy Spirit, JAHESHUA, the Chosen One of JAH (MischaJah)... but it is not what he has TOLD me. It is what I believe, based on my "education" from him:

I have no side to take on this one but I'm certainly not surprised. Trayvon Martin... THAT was a surprise. George Zimmerman wasn't even a cop and was told BY cops to leave the area. He chose not to... and a child is dead, as a result.

In this (Brown) case, I don't think the kid should'a been killed - like force for like threat... and he was unarmed (what, the cop didn't know how to defend himself against a big unarmed kid?) BUT... (1) he shouldn't have been stealing/strong arming in the first place (the universe doesn't like "ugly" and, sadly, sometimes what goes around comes around...) and (2) every black parent with an ounce of sense KNOWS to teach their children do NOT mess with the po-lice - the po-lice have a LICENSE... to kill! So don't mess with them... EVEN if you HAVE a gun.

I had the "talk" with my kids almost from day one. When they got to be early teens they thought I was talkin' old-fashioned melarkey. Until... at age 18... my son was pulled over, dragged out of the car, thrown onto the ground with dogs and shotguns at his head... because some guy, who was about 5'10 and weighed about 180 pounds allegedly robbed a store or something in the area. My son is almost 6'4... and weighs about 345 (he's a BIG guy). Only THEN did he "get" what I had been trying to tell him most of his life:

- No red/blue clothing
- No bandanas
- No hanging pants
- No starter jackets or fancy sneakers
- No afro
- No hoodies
- No ski caps
- No tickets (for ANY reason, except parking)
- No broken head/tail lights
- No suspended/expired license, registration, or insurance
- No unpaid traffic fines/parking tickets
- No rims on/bass in your car
- No fancy car
- Stay out of the 'hood... especially after dark, or around the 1st or 15th of the month
- Leave most white girls alone' if you like/need long hair, go Latin or Asian
- Have at least one credit card with a low balance (in case you need to post bail)
- Do NOT roll your window down or get out of the car if stopped by the police
- Slide you credentials through a slightly opened window
- If asked to get out, and you really think it's not a good idea, dial 9-1-1, if you can (if they answer, ask for additional assistance); if you can't, at least the call is registered and maybe even being recorded
- Do NOT get involved in public protests; if you really must, then when the police say disburse... DISBURSE and GO HOME; live to protest another day

And more...


Unlike Trayvon Martin, who we really know little about, this kid apparently thought his size would save him.. and so initially challenged the cop. Maybe only verbally, but still. As the mother of a large-sized black male, I can see where he MIGHT have thought that doing so wouldn't turn out (so) badly. Especially if the person isn't TAUGHT that size won't stop a bullet. Or, in this case, several bullets.

Thing is, he was a kid. Where his parents failed... the police officer SHOULD have stepped in. He SHOULD have tried to reason with this CHILD. Why didn't he? Because he obviously hadn't been trained to do so.

So, in MY mind... this wasn't Michael Brown's fault... or the officer that killed him's fault. It was Michael's parents' fault... for not preparing HIM for the REAL world of a young black male in the United States... and the Ferguson police force, State of Missouri, and United States culture... for not preparing the officer on how to deal with a black man-child.

Beyond that, I have to move on from it. Else, each time this mess happened... would "kill" ME.

Again, this is just my take. Not looking for anyone to agree... nor looking for debate. Just putting it out there. Maybe for some kind of catharsis. Maybe to just try and explain how some of "us" see it... are able to deal with it.

Peace to you, all.

A slave of Christ,

Shellamar


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 8:45 am 
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Shelby your take on this is very interesting to me and gives me a totally new perspective. I didn't really understand why they feel the need to riot as I don't see how looting and setting things on fire makes things right. I also thought that the kid was a hoodlum and seemed to be asking for it and if it was a white kid the same thing would have happened. Or would it?? But then I do not know what it is to be a black kid in America even in this day and age.

I can see the resentment there is in certain places for black people against the white cops by your comments. Profiling people by what they wear etc. must be terrible. Having to live your life never being allowed to be poor or wear a hoodie or certain colors because then you are lumped into people thinking you are a criminal would be awful.

Up here in Canada we don't fully appreciate what its like to be a African American living in big US cities. I thought it was horrible that even in the 60's there was segregation allowed and the Klu Klux Klan burning down black peoples places and lynching them. but does the oppressed oppressing and looting and burning things down and hurting innocent people nowadays make things right.

Its just horrible and so sad to see this happening.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 10:39 am 
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It is sad. Your post is sad. I have not been following the Ferguson case. But the things that you had to teach your son, and even just the incident of him getting thrown down like that... all because he is black and was in the area where another black man committed a crime... well, that is infuriating. But mostly sad. Anger is just a way to deal with the helplessness of it. That feeling of helpless (perhaps combined with a failed/lack of trust in authority) may be why some -perhaps many - people riot.


Thanks for your thoughts, Shelby.

Peace to you,
your sister and servant, and fellow slave of Christ,
tammy


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 11:23 am 
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I have intentionally NOT followed this case too closely. It's too upsetting, and it happens far too often. A senseless death from a senseless situation. However, I agree: (a) the police DO have a license to kill if they feel their life is in danger, and (b) the police are NOT trained to reason with people. Psychology would have to be in play, and most people, in a tense situation, throw reason out the window, including police. They are, after all, flesh and blood. No, that's not an excuse. It's just fact.

I think what's so tragic about this case, aside from Michael Brown's death, is all the lives that have been ruined in the aftermath. I shook my head last night at seeing the fires. Those business owners did NOT deserve this. How many people are in financial ruin because of this? How many people lost their jobs because of this? How many people will STILL go to jail over this? Really? It's all very senseless. Protest CAN be beneficial. But violence is NOT warranted. Those business owners did NOT kill Michael Brown. And, for that matter, neither did any other police officer.

As I keep saying to my son, who has strong opinions about this: WE do NOT know everything. The media IS NOT reporting / CAN NOT report all the facts because even THEY don't know it all. There's a reason the grand jury decided not to indict. We don't (YET) know what that reason is, and we may never know.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 25, 2014 12:20 pm 
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Shelby, if all the parents in the world whether single parents or not taught, shared and lived what you taught your two children....I know we would hear much less of tragedies like this.

But, teenagers and young adults well...I have a word to describe them but can't use it on here LOL...
And they can sure make a parent crazy in the way they think and some of things they do!

I am truly sorry about this situation. He was just a kid! And the cop that shot him was just a kid ( a little older kid) himself as well. Who truly knows what skeletons and issues he was pulling out of HIS closet?

Only Jah knows!....

I pray for the family to find some comfort and peace during this time and peace for the community as well!

Love, your sister in Christ, Kim


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 1:06 am 
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First. thank you (and peace to you!). dear Zoe, Tec, LQ, and 'Mom! I do understand how you feel - it is similar for me to others who have different kinds of lives... but yet, are subject to oppression... around the world. I want to share with you, though, my SON'S comments, which might help you even further (I know you've seen them on , dear 'Mom... and maybe you, too, dear Zoe):

Quote:
Lets be honest.....I've been big my entire life. I've also hung around a few big people who are not black and people do not "fear" us the same. I've never been arrested, had a warrant or seen the inside of a jail. I've worked with youth my entire life. I am friends with many law enforcement officers, several city council members, a few judges and more. I belong to two different leadership fellowships. I have 2 awards from the California State Senate, 2 from the California State Assembly and 3 from the Air Force for outstanding leadership. I skipped 2 grades and graduate high school (and started college) when I was 16. Past President of my Fraternity as well as the Past President of the Rizal Lions Club. I have mentor hundreds of teens, and was the ED of a really awesome Teen Lounge. I have traveled all over the country helping communities build and strengthen. I am the President of the Board for a Non Profit that helps teens with drug abuse and mental health issues. I have a 30 under 30 award in the CIty of Sacramento. My pit bull was a rescue and I have never HIT a woman or a man in my life. All of this before i was 30!! Yet I've been dragged out of my car with guns cocked, loaded and pointed at my head whole Police Canines growled inches from my face. I can say that I am 100% positive it happened because I was a BIG BLACK MALE! No need to lie to you about that there were plenty of witnesses. After they officers decided to let me know (because i obviously wasn't the 5'6 latino they were looking for) Not one of them offered an apology. Not a single mutha f'in 1. I am human! An f'n good one at that. I am also an American with rights (1 parent has a law degree while the other works at a law firm, so I know them well enough). However, every time I get pulled over, I understand that because I am BIG BLACK MALE my rights are null and void. That I must be very careful of what I say, the tone in which I say it or the slightest moves that i make. No matter what my day was like, or the mood I am in, I must revert back to the old "Yes Masah" way of communication. Even when my rights are being violated! Because unlike YOU, "the worst that can happen" is far more than being handcuffed for someone like me. Because unlike YOU, there is a chance I may not make it out alive from a traffic stop on my normal route home. Because unlike YOU the people who are suppose to protect me SCARE me the most. I do not attend Hood functions or hang with hoodlums, I do not live in the ghetto or even visit there often. I am not a gang member nor do I associate with them. So for me the POLICE, COPS, LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICERS are the biggest threat to MY LIFE not other BLACK MALES! This entire case is a reminder of that, and that anyone like me is in the same position! That is why I am pissed. And for all of YOU out there that still don't get it, thanks ok. Im not even at mad you. Any being the good black man that I am, I hope you or anyone in your family never has to find out how it feels to be ME!


And...

Quote:
For those who read this and support me, Thank You. But do not feel for a situation that happened to me, that I was PREPARED to deal with because my mother who raised me right and prepped me for injustices by the authorities. Feel for those who happen to look like me and who are not equipped to deal with incidences of oppression and racism. For it would seem their lives are doomed!


I don't refer folks to my kids' stuff too often... but here is a link to his comments and others' reactions to it. Not sure if it will work, though, 'cause I don't really understand Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/chaezboswell/p ... 4315392640

As I said in my comments, though, I can't dwell too long on this events. I have enough "fear" for my son that I learned to bury over the years by listening to my dear Lord... and these kinds of things often tend to dig them back up. So... I have to move on. No offense to anyone but I got what was "in" me about it out... and that's all I needed to do. I know you can understand that.

Peace... and MUCH love... to you, ALL!

A slave of Christ,

Shellamar


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 8:05 am 
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Thanks for posting your son's thoughts on this, it helps to understand the problem better.

OMG Shelby how did you produce such a big man like that?? You are so tiny. Well I have a big boy myself but not as big as yours, just Wow. He sounds like a man to be proud of.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 9:53 am 
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Very powerful, Shel. Thanks for sharing that. Definitely a perspective I had not considered.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2014 12:39 pm 
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Good Morning Shelby!..

Your sons post was educational..
He sounds like a good man and you raised him right..

..............................................Image...OUTLAW

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 27, 2014 10:31 am 
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Good post by your son, Shelby. Hearing your perspective, both of you, has helped me in the past and also now, to understand matters of discrimination, etc, in other parts of the world.


Peace to you both,
your sister and servant, and fellow slave of Christ,
tammy


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 27, 2014 12:26 pm 
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...and now there's the 12-year old boy that got shot by a police officer in Cleveland. The person who called 9-1-1 to report the 12-year old even told the dispatcher that the "gun" "looked fake." (That being the case, why did he call 9-1-1 in the first place?) Today's news reports state that the officer shot the 12-year old within 2 seconds of arriving at the scene. The Cleveland Police have published the video of the shooting. I can't bring myself to watch it, it's watching a real killing; I can hardly watch fake killings in films!

One thing I don't understand is why the kid had a gun, even though a fake one, at all. "Everyone" knows that's not a wise thing to do these days! Maybe he wanted to be tough or act tough, maybe he'd seen others do something similar so when he got the notion he did the same thing himself. Related to that, though, is this: why shouldn't he be safe while "brandishing" (the news word) a toy gun? Toy companies sell them and that's OK! It's OK to buy but not to play with? Or is it unsafe only when "used while Black"? I know Cudell (the rec center where the shooting took place); it's not the greatest neighborhood any more but not the worst, by far. I just wonder what would have happened if a white 12-year old had done the same thing if the police would have handled the situation in the same way. In this regard I recall a statement from another recent news article, this one on militarizing the police, stating it's one thing when the police were charged with protecting, another thing when they are policing whole neighborhoods. I don't think those officers saw a 12-year old with a toy, I think they saw a whole neighborhood in transition and thought they were cleaning out the source of decay. (That area was, for generations, considered all white, and the old locals did not like to see it change.)

I read an opinion piece within the last week where the writer claimed that historically, Blacks do not place the same emphasis on peaceful resistance and that guns, violence, etc. are traditionally a part of the Black method of engendering societal change. Someone more closely related to that situation will, perhaps, be able to comment on the truthfulness of that statement; I sure didn't pick up on it in my White existence!

Shel, I feel bad that you saw the need to inculcate those Do's and Don't's into your children. I know you were right (and savvy!) to do so, but it's so very unfair! Your son has never been "free" and I sense a certain resentment in his comments that you posted. Still, he's alive and relatively unscathed, so as unfair as it is, all of you can rejoice in that. I know of another "son," tihs one born into a "mixed" family, who was brought up in the White way (believing there was no one who had the right to approach a person who was doing no wrong but simply conducting his own life and not disturbing anybody). When that son grew up and left home he had a rough time dealing with a world filled with people who saw anything Tan as Black and who called the law on him even for simple things like browsing a magazine rack while waiting in a transportation terminal! That son isn't doing as well as yours, in fact, he's pretty discouraged and depressed. People who don't live under attack just don't know what it's like! It's traumatizing, even though voluntarily relinquishing human rights is meant for protection and preservation.

I don't think things are going to get any better in the foreseeable future. I think we'd all (in the USA) better get used to the idea that the role of law enforcement is changing. I think it was wise of you, Shel, to separate the "now" from everything else (history, human rights, etc.) and to teach your children what they needed to do to be as safe as possible and not bring trouble down upon their own heads. I think we'd all better learn to do that! The discussions about what is "right" in the universal sense can only take place when the present danger has passed, if the people involved are still alive to do the discussing!

To everyone: Take Care. May Peace be with you.

AB


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 27, 2014 9:02 pm 
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That is sad, Anne, and for so many reasons. Should not have happened, again for so many reasons. Including that the officers involved in this case were not told that the gun might be fake, according to a statement released by the police.

Here is a link to the article in question. The video in this article doesn't show much, and you have to click on the 'play' icon to get it to play, but don't click if you can't watch what happens.

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/27/us/vi ... .html?_r=0




For me, what makes me understand the tragedy on a deeper level... is that my youngest son is 12. I'm trying to picture him in this scenario. And I can't imagine that he would even have a clue what to do if police officers drove up shouting at him to put his hands up, no matter what he was doing. I would think that his natural reaction would be to freeze or back away to run. Or... like this boy maybe thought the officers wanted... to try and hand the gun over to the officers, or even just reach for it to show them that it wasn't real.

I mean, putting my son in that place, it become so UNREAL.


That boy was a child.

That officer is going to have to live with this. The man who called 9-11 is probably going to live with remorse/regret that he made the call to begin with. His parents (or whoever gave him that gun to play with - even if they did teach him not to point it at people or take it outside or to the park) will live with remorse and regret.

And yes, it is STUPID, for toy guns to be allowed to sold (even if they are marked with an orange tip), if they can be mistaken for real guns.



So sad, again.


May those who need it from this tragedy be given peace, as Christ gives peace, and may you all also be given peace as always,
your sister and servant, and fellow slave of Christ,
tammy


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 27, 2014 10:22 pm 
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Thank you ALL for your responses... and peace to you all!

Dear Zoe... peace to you, dear lady... and big men run on both sides of my son's family. My mother's brothers are/were big men as were/are my son's uncles on his father's side. No tall women, though.

Dear Anne B... peace to you, my sister... and you hit several nails on the head, thank you!

All... there is another layer to my perspective, and maybe it's a cowardly one (some might say so, but I don't think)... and that is, as a child born in the 1950's, of parents (well, a parent - I was raised by my father) the 1930's... and a descendant of American slaves... I am just glad we no longer live in a time when a black boy can be lynched... just for whistling at a white lady (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emmett_Till).

As for WHY I taught my children what I did, I can only say that I cannot teach them what I don't know myself. And I have NEVER known what many in this country call "freedom." I shared what I did with my kids based very largely on my own experiences, which I won't bore you dears ones with (and there are far, far too many - too much board space to take up). I did what I did for the PRACTICALITY... of giving my son a chance to live past "age 18 to 25." Because for many young black males... the odds are greatly stacked against that.

Unlike my son, however, in ADDITION to law enforcement, I did fear other black males for him (i.e., "gang bangers", drug dealers, etc.) AS WELL AS other male whites, latinos, tongans, etc. I came from the 'hood, ya'll. And when I say 'hood... I mean THE 'hood. I grew up in Southeast San Diego ("Skyline," to be specific), which is the "South Central" (LA) of San Diego:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.p ... an%20Diego

As someone who grew up in the 'hood, I KNEW what my son's chances of survival was if I DIDN'T teach him these things: zero. I knew that if I didn't educate him as to the REALITY of being black male... either a gang would get him... or the police would. There usually wasn't a third choice where I come from... but I chose to make one for him. Starting with restricting his "freedom" myself, but for his own GOOD. Hence, MY "rules."

And they were no different than, say, the "rule" JAH gave Adham. NOT "don't eat from that tree or I will kill you," but "don't eat... because if you DO... you will die." Same thing for my son: "Don't do... whatever" not because I would kill him... but because I knew that the chances were SO great that someone ELSE would.

Anyway...

Again, thank you all for understanding/trying to understand. It is TRULY appreciated.

Peace to you!

Your servant and a slave of God,

Shellamar


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